* * *
She swam in blackness. Time had ceased to exist here. She neither felt nor cared for its passing. Where time existed, pain awaited. She had no concrete memory of the pain, and she felt nothing in the blackness; yet she knew without doubt that the pain was there, beyond reach, waiting. If she moved outward, to whatever lay beyond the blackness, the pain would consume her. The blackness was safe.
Even so, she knew she could not hide the in black forever. Something awaited her, beyond. Something other than pain. Something that she had to do. Something important.
But how could she bear the pain? Would she even be able to do this important thing with that unspeakable pain bearing down upon her? How could she face it? She was only one small soul, hardly important in the grand scheme of things. Her small spark couldn’t matter. Yet, she knew there was something she was supposed to do. If only she knew what it was. She had no more memory of that thing than she had of the pain. She simply knew.
And so she let herself remain in the blackness, apart from time and memory, floating in the endless void of nothingness. It couldn’t last forever; she would have to face the pain eventually. If she did not, there would be worse than the pain; perhaps not for her, but for others. She was needed. But she had to steel herself, first. The pain loomed, on the periphery of her awareness. And she was afraid.
* * *
